Rattlesnakes

Felix, my husband, was playing golf with our town's fire chief when he hit a ball into the rough. As Felix headed for the brush to find his ball, the chief warned him, "Be careful; the rattlesnakes are out."

The chief explained that calls had been coming in all week requesting assistance with removing the snakes.

"You've got to be kidding," Felix replied in astonishment. "People actually call the fire department to help them with rattlesnakes? What do you say to them?"

 "Well," said the chief, "the first thing I ask is, 'Is it on  fire?'"